Thoughts are an indication of what I am feeling at the moment...feelings of which I may be totally unaware. So, the more often I recognize and label each thought as it occurs-as it pops into my mind, the more proficient I will become at getting in touch with what I am actually feeling.

This whole process-the thinking feeling process-- is SO subtle that I will want to develop this heightened awareness on a consistent basis in order to experience the results I am seeking.

When a feeling is aroused, it is usually triggered by a belief or a system of belief I have previously established. When this happens, the feeling will be followed by a flood of thoughts or by more feelings. Sometimes this concept seems complicated to me. However, unless I learn where the focal point begins, the effectiveness of what I can accomplish will be limited.

My prime responsibility is to tune in to my inner dialogue. Discover the thoughts in my mind that keep looking for a home. I continue to learn to recognize mindless chatter, prattle or self-talk. As I listen to my inner dialogue, I focus on what it is I am saying to myself. This is where the transfer point or the shift to awareness begins.

The point of this is... I must be mindful of my inner dialogue! I have a choice of what that dialogue will be. Will it be negative rather than positive? For me to experience rewarding and peaceful results instead of living with the conflict of jangled, frazzled, disrupted nerves, it is necessary for me to change this inner dialogue-this inner self-talk.

The more I get in touch with and identify what I am really feeling, the more capacity and ability I will have to change my negative internal programming, self-talk, or inner dialogue. As I continue to be Response-able and Account-able for my thoughts and feelings, I WILL eventually become the person I really WANT to be instead of remaining the person my incorrect perceptions have created.

Today is my birthday. I am 62 years young. :) Yesterday was Easter, what a glorious weekend it has been. My heart is filled with gratitude for my Savior Jesus Christ and his Atonement and resurrection. I am filled with gratitude for my awesome children and grandchildren. I am grateful for my children's father and his graciousness and generousity in their behalf. I was treated to a birthday dinner Saturday night by my children who live in Arizona. The company was great, the food delicious and very filling, it was a fun evening. I really missed having my youngest daughter here with the rest of us. She and her family live in Washington State. Yesterday, after church we went to my daughters home, who lives in Surprise and had Easter dinner with them, her in-laws and my daughter and family that live in Laveen. A birthday cake and candles, singing happy birthday, it was wonderful. We visited and had a lovely afternoon. We ended the Sabbath day by attending our "Empty Nesters" Family Home Evening group. It was a blessed weekend.
I received several birthday calls this morning. I am a very blessed woman!

Flannery O'Connor penned these words: "I write to discover what I know."

Perhaps through my efforts at blogging I can open a door where hidden knowledge is stored and discover the inner voice that's begging to be set free. I don't claim to be in league with the following, but I'm intrigued by the possibilities.

• "Write down the thoughts of the moment. Those that come unsought for are commonly the most valuable." -Francis Bacon


• "I wrote the book, Werther, almost unconsciously, like a somnambulist, and was amazed when I realized what I had done." -Goethe


• "There is a power above and behind us and we are the channel of its communications." -Ralph Waldo Emerson

I'm really hoping to discover the hidden voice that everyone seems to have and only the persistent find; so I suspect that this little blog will be a reality check on my persistence. I'll leave you now with wishes for a healthy and happy day. I'm going searching for that ahidden door and the hidden voice behind it.

Very soon to be 62 and first time blogging

First time every to blog. What an exciting event for an almost 62 yr. old woman.

My blog title is "April's Apercu." For anyone who might read my blog, the word apercu pronounced (a-pear-su) means,"a discerning perception; an insight. A short outline or summary; a synopsis.

I thought the word fit very well with the meaning for my blog. Time will tell how consistent I will be in writing on a regualr basis. At least I have made a start.